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In a competitive society, in a society in which success is seen to happen at one’s expense, a win/win attitude brings a refreshing and freeing alternative. Underpinned with a premise that success is not about taking at one’s expense but creating a scenario in which everyone wins, a win/win attitude can function in any field: in business, in relations, and in one’s development. So, then, a win/win attitude? How is it useful, and can one develop one in life? In this blog post, the power of a win/win outlook, its benefits, and real-life tips for its development have been discussed. Let`s dive in!


What is a Win/Win Attitude?

A win/win attitude, in its root, is a premise that everyone can have enough success, opportunity, and happiness for everyone else too. In contrast with working with a scarcity model—one in which one’s gain involves loss for one’s counterpart—a win/win outlook is in abundance thinking. The theory gained widespread acceptance with Stephen R. Covey’s book, in which, in The 7 Habits of Highly Successful People, he defined Win/Win as being the sole long-term and moral path towards success. According to him, all other approaches—win/lose, lose/win, and lose/lose—all result in failure, grudges, and unsatisfactory results.


Win/Lose, Lose/Win, and Lose/Lose: Comparing with a Win/Win

• Win/Lose: "For me to win, for you to lose." All about competition, me-first, and short-term thinking.

• Lose/Win: "I’ll give in for others." Often ends in grudges, low-esteem, and getting taken for a ride.

• Lose/Lose: "If I don’t win, neither will you." Destructive and motivated through vengeance, jealousy, and malice.

• Win/Win: “We can both win.” That behaviour creates collaboration, shared gain, and long-term relations.

A win/win position isn’t compromising, but cooperating—seeking a win in which everyone can depart with a satisfied and empowered state.


The Value of a Win/Win Orientation

A win/win state of mind isn’t idealistic but pragmatic and creates added fulfillment and success in life.

1. Builds Relationships

Where individuals believe that you care about them and about them growing and thriving, trust is developed. In business, in friendships, and in family, a win/win position creates deeper and enduring relations.

2. Builds Long-Term Success

Quick success with a win/lose position could gain quick reward, but at a cost: ruining relations and one’s name. With a win/win state of mind, success is long-term and with integrity and with consideration.

3. Builds Cooperation and Teams

Win/win working groups work with added productivity, inventiveness, and motivation. With a win/win state of mind, everyone feels valued and included, and will therefore deliver best.

4. Reduces Conflict and Stress

Where individuals strive for win through competitive behavior, tension in relations and added stress arise. With a win/win state of mind, unnecessary battles for win occur less through open discussion and through win/wins for everyone.

5. Builds Growth and Learning

A win/win state of mind perceives challenge and difficulty not a danger, but an opportunity for development and expansion through collaboration.


How to Cultivate a Win/Win Stance

Creating a win/win state of mind takes intention, awareness, and practice. To build a powerful state of mind, try these key actions first:

1. Transition out of Thinking in Scarcity

One of greatest obstacles to a win/win state of mind is thinking in scarcity: There isn’t enough for everyone, whether success, wealth, opportunity, etc.

To transition out of scarcity thinking:

• Recognize that life is not a zero-sum game. Not everyone’s success necessarily constitutes your failure.

• Be glad for success in others and don’t perceive it as a threat.

• Work towards creating opportunity, not competing for a finite pool.

2. Empathize and Active Listen

To have real win/win, you have to know what others desire and require. That takes empathizing—seeing through their eyes.

• Not interrupt, don’t even form your answer.

• Ask questions in an attempt to understand concerns and motives.

• Recognize feelings and have a real concern for their welfare.

3. Look for Mutual Benefit in All Interaction

Prior to deciding and committing, ask yourself:

• Does everyone involved win?

• Is a better result for everyone a possibility?

• Is everyone being fairly and with regard?

Seek out win/win thinking with both parties feeling valued and satisfied.

4. Speak with Honesty and Clarity

Clear, direct speaking is key in developing trust and harmony. In speaking your wants and your requirements in communicating them:

• Be direct but respectful.

• Make your wants and listening to them explicit.

• Keep your conversation focused on solutions, not criticism.

5. Have a Long-Term Relationship Orientation

Win/win thinking values relationships over deals. Instead of thinking about getting your hands on it today, have regard for long-term impact.

• Build for relationships, not for exploiting.

• Think about larger consequences, not immediate gain.

• Build your character for fairness, trust, and collaboration.

6. Let Ego and Need to "Win" Go

A big inhibitor to win/win thinking is wanting to win and be in charge. Dropping your ego opens your mind to seeing and discussing options.

• Not view clashes as battles to win.

• Be happy to compromise and not "lose."

• Recognize that collaboration will produce a greater success than competition.

7. Adopt a Problem-Solving Orientation

In a challenge, attempt to think in terms of solutions, not in terms of problems. Instead of thinking about obstacles, attempt to respond to:

• How can one generate an outcome for everyone?

• What can one attempt that will work for everybody?

• How can one make it an opportunity and not a failure?

The more one employs a positive problem-solving orientation, the less challenging it will become to generate win/win scenarios.


Win/Win Examples in Everyday Life

Business: Business Organizations That Employ a Win/Win Philosophy

Many successful companies operate with a win/win orientation. For example:

• Apple and Google invest in workers' wellness, knowing healthy and happy workers work best.

• Organizations such as Patagonia practice buying with ethics, benefiting both the business and environment.

• Company service such as Amazon prioritizes pleasing customers, and in return, reaps long-term devotion.

Partnerships: Balance in Relationships

Healthy partnerships rely on a win/win orientation. Instead of one party compromising, both parties must:

• Be supportive of one's aspirations and aspirations.

• Make accommodations for both.

• Be transparent about requirements and requirements.

Negotiations: Building Joint Triumph

A win/win negotiation scenario is a salary negotiation, for example. Instead of requesting a raise with no consideration for the position of the corporation, an individual can attempt suggesting:

• How one can contribute value to the corporation.

• Incentives for performance for both.

• Adjustments for both with a win for both.


The Conclusion

A win/win attitude redefines life, relationships, and success in one's life. With a win/win orientation, one can generate meaningful relationships, long-term success, and a feeling of accomplishment, none of which can one generate with competition. By transforming one's outlook to an abundance one, practicing sympathy, communicating openly, and thinking in terms of collaboration, one can generate success that not only enriches one but everyone else, too.

~Remember, true success isn't about outdoing them in competition, but outdoing them in collaboration.~ 

So, today, simply ask yourself: How can I make my next encounter a win/win?